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Showing posts with label Penny Smale. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Penny Smale. Show all posts

Friday, 18 May 2012

Three Strangers

Three strangers watched the farm below. 

Nothing happened.

‘Remember the new barn? Horse circled for three days.’

 ‘Aye, but it were a fine do after she were finished.  The boy climbing up here and rolling into the hedge?’

‘Cider soaked. Didna find him ‘till the morn!’

Two buzzards, floating above, watched the ancient wraiths faded away


© Penny Smale May 2012
All rights reserved

Wednesday, 21 March 2012

Mirror

They say that Mirror Image on the wall
Always tells the truth an’ all
But it never shows what others see,
Thank god for that cause it’s not Me!
I stare and stare, but deep I know
That Mirror Image on the wall
Can’t ever tell the truth at all!

© Penny Smale March, 2012
All rights reserved

Blah blah blah….

“ Blah blah blah….And here we have the kitchen, with useful deep-set shelving here by the window..”

‘there used to be a door there, when this was two cottages’

“…And the Aga of course is always the heart of a home”

‘ you can still see where there used to be stairs where the Aga is now.

“this makes a nice dining room or snug”

‘tell them that the over-mantle is from Exeter cathedral’

“the hay barn above the stables”

‘ is great for a band for summer parties.  If you look on the end wall up in there,  you can see where various children over the years have drawn peeing men, spitfires, and mystic circles..

“Note the beamed ceiling here in the annex, an attractive feature”

‘from when this was part of the hay-barn.  The same beams are in there.  They must have blocked up the holes to drop hay into the stables below, which explains the uneven floor.’

“Not a bad little garden out the back here”

‘over forty different species of birds have been observed here over the years’

“I understand that down there used to be a root store..”

‘tell them about the doorway you can just see if you lean forward to look down.  It leads into a corridor running behind the yard stables, and there’s a secret room there with electric light..’

“I must say that the views here are outstanding”

‘ if you’d only bother to take them to the top of the hill behind us you can have a 360 degree view.  You can see the Wellington Monument on a clear day..’

“Blah blah blah…”

© Penny Smale March 2012
All rights reserved

Hold On, Just a Little While Longer…

The silence really is deafening.  My mouth and eyes are gritted with sand as I lie, face down, pinned to the ground by an enormous weight across my pelvis.

After what seems like an age of silent stillness, I hear my sister’s calmly panicked footsteps as she approaches us.

‘Put your arms round the back of your head, and I will guide her legs away.  Hold on just a little while longer’

The air suddenly feels three times heavy with apprehension

‘Penny! Now! Roll away! Quick!’

The imprint of my riding glove from when I had first hit the sand could be clearly seen on my face for several days.

Selma and I had shared a frightening experience and we remained together for a further twenty years.

Each with a bad back!

© Penny Smale
All rights reserved

Thursday, 17 November 2011

September

9/9/’59 Another new school. The date on my virgin exercise books on that first day made a big impression. Maybe because my parents were now divorced. 

‘It might as well rain until September’ I cry listening to that song! First Love! Subsequently died in a motor-bike accident. Police at our door at midnight, thought that I was his dead passenger.

© Penny Smale 
All rights reserved

Tuesday, 23 August 2011

Coastal Path

On a sunny day, follow the beautiful Coastal Path, that wends its way along the steep cliff top, and enjoy the far reaching sea view. Long beaches at the base of the cliff are revealed at low tide, as are the outcrops of picturesque black jagged rocks, home to….

Danger 

Crouching lookouts, shielded lights, crashing waves, groaning, breaking keel. Screams, death. The Wreckers’ Prize.
Danger 
Crouching lookouts, shielded lights, snipers, guns. Mines, death.  The Landing Enemy.
Danger 
Scared that unseen hands are drawing me to the edge. Fear of falling, spiralling, screaming, through the air. Crashing onto the beach. Dead; or worse.
I hate Coastal Paths.

© Penny Smale 2011
All rights reserved

Friday, 8 July 2011

Good Housekeeping Recipe for Life

I am a true blue Baby Boomer, born to a patriotic family, as depicted in the wartime black and white films. With such a background, I know that Good Housekeeping is the bible of British Life.
  
Basic Ingredients:         Siblings, preferably of even numbers, so one is not left out.
                                      Elderly Relative, to give good advice and suggest jolly pranks.
                                      Freedom, to roam miles, and befriend local  Worthies.
                                      Mystery to Solve, including outwitting Bad Eggs.

Dressing:                      A Decent loving and attractive partner, as in Georgette Heyer.
                                      A Darling little house, cottage or flat,  in which to nest.

Decoration:                   An even number of bright eyed and talented children.
  An artistic and eccentric mother-in-law, whose best friend is     
  your mother.

  Daddy.

 Follow the above instructions, to the letter, until you are fifty years old.

Please note that Good Housekeeping can not be held responsible for the success of recipes as their execution is dependant solely on the quality of the ingredients used.

© Penny Smale July 2011
All rights reserved

The Cage

This was written in 1998, I believe, just after my divorce was finalised.  I was probably sitting on my terrace, in the dusk, and halfway through my second bottle of wine!  I was fifty….

Thinking about it, I have been living in a cage for the last 23 years, albeit of my own making, and with my husband’s assistance.

From being a self-confident person, with a good career, blessed with a large amount of optimism, I gradually turned myself into something I wasn’t, and something neither I, nor as it turned out, my husband, liked any more!

You know, you meet someone and you fall in love, and then, if you are not careful, the two of you go about changing, if not each other, then the more besotted.  It of course takes two to do this, but then you must not be surprised if, having changed your personality to suit your lover, you are then no longer suited.

I see now that I caged myself.  I wanted to please, and I went along with everything.
I completely forgot that I had been my own person, so I carefully helped to build my cage, stepped inside and threw away the key.

Who can ever be happy in a cage, once they realise it is there?  Luckily for me, my husband found the key, and using it, pushed (and I do mean ‘pushed’) me out of the cage we had built and told me to go away.

I wanted to stay with what I knew and whom I loved, and I was scared to fly, but he kept pushing me away until finally I realised that he was serious.  Eventually I stopped begging to be allowed back into my cage and instead started to explore my new surroundings.

You know, it’s not at all bad out here, and I am rediscovering my confidence and myself.

As for my husband, it seems that he wanted to be what I had become, and so his new partner is obliging by rapidly building him his own cage!
  
© Penny Smale July 2011
All rights reserved

Monday, 13 June 2011

Oh my God

Oh my God.  I can’t believe I did it.  I threw your letters away in the tide.  I found them last night stuffed behind the books that I had promised the Cancer Charity people who come round asking for stuff to resell.  I just thought I’d give them some books, but then your letters fell out of that old dictionary that you and I used to read for fun.

Do you remember testing each other on words, trying to find old meanings? What about ‘dinner’?  Do you remember?  ‘Dinner without grace – antenuptial sexual intercourse’. Who would have thought it?


My Dear, I re-read your letters and wish I hadn’t.  I came down here last night, and tossed them one by one into the waves, crying as I did it for all that we lost.

Now, as I stand here looking at the sands, I realise that, foolishly, I have lost you yet again.  My dear, I am just so very sorry.

© Penny Smale 2011
All rights reserved

The New Dog

Last Christmas, my family played host to three dogs, and, a cat. Our fourteen year old border collie, (Police Woman Cass), belonged to my daughter and kept very much to her perceived duty of looking after the family, checking on the young (children, animals, etc) with a very strong idea of right and wrong which she was more than capable of indicating.

The ‘middle’ dog’ family name was Beaker.  She was bought as a Rhodesian Ridgeback. However, as she matured it became obvious that she was part Labrador.  Very shy and retiring, she was kept in her place by ‘WPC’ Cass.

Our third dog, Rufus was a 6½ year old pure bred Ridgeback who was nervous and clingy; not a good advert for the breed!

Anyway, on Boxing Day, Cass, responsible to the end, died of old age.

As the family tears dried, it became apparent a couple of weeks into January that Rufus was not at all well.  He was losing weight, and after three months of weekly visits to the vets, and numerous tests, my poor loving and foolish Rufus made his last visit to the surgery, where he was sympathetically put down.

Poor Beaker, who had, with Cass’s demise, thought that she would be top dog, suddenly found herself alone.  For the first few days it was great, but then she became depressed and un-responsive.

SO, a new dog! Breaking family tradition, a 7-month old dachshund, needing a new home from a loving family reluctant to give him up, was collected from his first home in Wales. I have never owned a ‘small dog’ and later I was to find out why!!

Renamed ‘Badger’ he quickly seemed to fit in.  Charming, playful, loving, and cheering up Beaker.  The two of them made an amusing pair. At night he willingly slept in his ‘crate’ (a modern version of a kennel), and returned to it without argument, as needed.

Everyone who met him, (the vet, and his many staff members) fell on Badger as a lovely little dog, sweet, amusing handsome etc, and almost all mentioned how they had either owned a dachshund in the past or, in two cases, had bred them. “I will have him, if you can’t cope” was a regular comment, always, as I now recall, with a big grin.

I did not twig.  I did not pick up on the regular phrase “if you can’t cope”

Badger, (bless his cotton socks) is now 10 months old.  He is still the cheerful, loving, bouncy, happy dog he has always been. He is a joy.

BUT, now, at 10months, the HOUND genes have kicked in.  When they do, not even I think that he is my dog.  He’s off, down in the heavily overgrown ditch that marks a boundary to my neighbours’ property, barking at their Larsen trap. Even if I see him and call, he’s off again, up to the fields on the hill, barking at rabbits that have gone to earth.  Twice he has returned with small pieces of stick wedged across the roof of his mouth, and twice he has returned with dead birds, (he doesn’t pluck them, just treats them as toys to be taken ‘to bed’). And of course there was the dead rabbit.  All fine, he’s a young dog after all. (She says through slightly gritted teeth).

This week he excelled himself.  He and the cat, (who is a voracious hunter) investigated the bonfire pile that now sticks out like a beacon of fun since the hay has been cut.  They put up two rabbits, and I left them to it.  Two hours later, the cat had returned for supper, but the Badge had not.

I am a worrier, often with out due cause, but can never stop worrying once I start, in case ‘this is the time…’  On investigating the pile of cut holly branches, broken pallets etc, I realised that Super Hound was trapped deep in the middle.  I am not up to this: hauling heavy bits of wood and being attacked by spikes as the rain threatens.

However, 45 minutes later, after much huffing and puffing, stings and scratches and a sore back, that the next morning complained loudly’, my ungrateful little hound was free, just to rush off again to the next interesting hedge!

I am now assured, (with the same grins) that he will grow out of this natural behaviour and become more home-loving, but in the meantime, I have just substituted worry for my children by worry for a dog!
  
© Penny Smale 2011
All rights reserved  

Monday, 23 May 2011

Imagine this:

One hundred and twenty-eight Frogs on horseback, riding over the water.
Clogs clatter on wood as the sea creaks and cracks.
As they reach their destination, the Senior Frog cries out 'O La,'
And a Saw Bones looks out, surprised to see these brightly dressed Frogs 
so far from the shore
The year is 1795.

© Penny Smale
All rights reserved


Charles Mozin's Capture of the Dutch Fleet
For more information about this extraordinary event at the end of the French advance into the Netherlands in the winter of 1795-5 see French Cavalry Defeats Dutch Fleet?

Riddle

But For Me, her breasts would sag, her eyes would squint to see,
     Her hair, lie lank and thin, her shoulders hunch.

But For Me, her teeth would loosen and fall out, her neck would crease,
     Her memory would fail and her nails would become hardened claws.

But for Me!


© Penny Smale
All rights reserved

Saturday, 30 April 2011

You Mean It’s Not Your Gun?

He died and slumped against the wall as I stood watching from the hall behind you.

You try to say it's not your gun!  Of course it's yours, you picked it up!

And anyway, I saw it fall and skim across the floor.

Before others come, please take back your gloves, and let me say (strictly between ourselves) a heartfelt “Thank you.”

You have cleared the path to my inheritance

@ Penny Smale
All rights reserved

Monday, 14 March 2011

Hell

Hell is subjective, draining and personal.
Being afraid - of what?
Worry that you can't control.

Not knowing - unable to find out.
Regret - you didn't do better.


Realising the pain that you did not intend.
Waiting for the call that never comes.
Loneliness, whilst in a crowd.
Hell is personal.


© Penny Smale
All rights reserved